~PK’s Jokes~

MEMORY TEST!
This is NOT a pushover test. There are 20 questions.
Average score is 12. This one will be difficult for the younger set. Have fun, but no peeking!
1. What builds strong bodies 12 ways?

A. Flintstones vitamins
B. The Buttmaster
C. Spaghetti
D. Wonder Bread
E. Orange Juice
F. Milk
G. Cod Liver Oil

2. Before he was Muhammed Ali, he was…

A. Sugar Ray Robinson
B. Roy Orbison
C. Gene Autry
D. Rudolph Valentino
E. Fabian
F. Mickey Mantle
G. Cassius Clay

3. Pogo, the comic strip character said, ‘We have met the enemy and…

A. It’s you
B. He is us
C. It’s the Grinch
D. He wasn’t home
E. He’s really me an
F. We quit
G. He surrendered

4. Good night David.

A. Good nigh Chet
B. Sleep well
C. Good night Irene
D. Good night Gracie
E. See you later alligator
F. Until tomorrow
G. Good night Steve

5. You’ll wonder where the yellow went…
A. When you use Tide
B. When you lose your crayons
C. When you clean your tub
D. If you paint the room blue
E. If you buy a soft water tank
F. When you use Lady Clairol
G. When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent

6.. Before he was the Skipper’s Little Buddy, Bob Denver was Dobie’s friend….

A. Stuart Whitman
B. Randolph Scott
C. Steve Reeves
D. Maynard G. Krebbs
E. Corky B. Dork
F. Dave the Whale
G. Zippy Zoo

7. Liar, liar…

A. You’re a liar
B. Your nose is growing
C. Pants on fire
D. Join the choir
E. Jump up higher
F. On the wire
G. I’m telling Mom

8. Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights a never ending battle for
truth, justice and…

A. Wheaties
B. Lois Lane
C. TV ratings
D. World peace
E. Red tights
F. The American way
G. News headlines

9. Hey kids! What time is it?

A. It’s time for Yogi Bear
B. It’s time to do your homework
C. It’s Howdy Doody Time
D. It’s Time for Romper Room
E. It’s bedtime
F. The Mighty Mouse Hour
G. Scoopy Doo Time

10. Lions and tigers and bears…

A. Yikes
B.. Oh no
C. Gee whiz
D. I’m scared
E. Oh my
F. Help! Help!
G. Let’s run

11. Bob Dylan advised us never to trust anyone…

A. Over 40
B. Wearing a uniform
C. Carrying a briefcase
D. Over 30
E. You don’t know
F. Who says, ‘Trust me’
G. Who eats tofu

12. NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women’s
stockings…

A. Troy Aikman
B. Kenny Stabler
C. Joe Namath
D. Roger Stauback
E. Joe Montana
F. Steve Young
G. John Elway

13. Brylcream…

A. Smear it on
B. You’ll smell great
C. Tame that cowlick
D. Grease ball heaven
E. It’s a dream
F. We’re your team
G. A little dab’ll do ya

14. I found my thrill…

A. In Blueberry muffins
B. With my man, Bill
C. Down at the mill
D. Over the windowsill
E. With thyme and dill
F. Too late to enjoy
G. On Blueberry Hill

15. Before Robin Williams, Peter Pan was played by…

A. Clark Gable
B. Mary Martin
C. Doris Day
D. Errol Flynn
E. Sally Fields
F. Jim Carey
G. Jay Leno

16. Name the Beatles…

A. John, Steve, George, Ringo
B. John, Paul, George, Roscoe
C. John, Paul, Stacey, Ringo
D. Jay, Paul, George, Ringo
E. Lewis, Peter, George, Ringo
F. Jason, Betty, Skipper, Hazel
G. John, P aul, George, Ringo

17. I wonder, wonder, who..

A. Who ate the leftovers?
B. Who did the laundry?
C. Was it you?
D. Who wrote the book of love?
E. Who I am?
F. Passed the test?
G. Knocked on the door?

18. I’m strong to the finish…

A. Cause I eats my broccoli
B. Cause I eats me spinach
C. Cause I lift weights
D. Cause I’m the hero
E. And don’t you forget it
F. Cause Olive Oyl loves me
G. To outlast Bruto

19. When it’s least expected, you’re elected, you’re the star today…

A. Smile, you’re on Candid Camera
B. Smile, you’re on Star Search
C. Smile, you won the lottery
D. Smile, we’re watching you
E. Smile, the world sees you
F. Smile, you’re a hit
G. Smile, you’re on TV

20. What do M & M’s do?

A. Make your tummy happy
B. Melt in your mouth, not in your pocket
C. Make you fat
D. Melt your heart
E. Make you popular
F. Melt in your mouth, not in your hand
G. Come in colors

Below are the right answers:

1. D - Wonder Bread
2. G - Cassius Clay
3. B - He Is Us
4. A - Good night, Chet
5. G - When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent
6. D - Maynard G. Krebbs
7. C - Pants On Fire
8. F - The American Way
9. C - It’s Howdy Doody Time
10. E - Oh My
11. D - Over 30
12. C - Joe Namath
13. G - A little dab’ll do ya
14. G - On Blueberry Hill
15. B - Mary Martin
16. G - John, Paul, George, Ringo
17. D - Who wrote the book of Love
18. B - Cause I eats me spinach
19. A - Smile, you’re on Candid Camera
20. F - Melt In Your Mouth Not In Your Hand

How many horses in this picture? Should find 7

Look at the middle column.
Where does it end?

DO YOU SEE FOUR PEOPLE?

Who is the tallest?

A face? … Or, the word ‘liar’ ?

NEXT:
What do you see here?
Do you see the word “LIFT”?
Or, a bunch of black splotches ?

GIRLS ARE ABLE TO SPOT THE WORD “LIFT” EASILY.
MEN FIND IT DIFFICULT TO SEE THE WORD “LIFT”!!!

NEXT? FIND THE FACES:

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OBJECT?

THIS WAS COOL!!! PASS IT ON

Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer
them instantly. You can’t take your time, answer all of them
immediately.

OK?
Let’s find out just how clever you really are….
Ready? GO!!!

First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What
position are you in?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person, you take his place,
so you are second!
Try not to screw up next time.
Now answer the second question,
but don’t take as much time as you took for the first one, OK ?

Second Question:
I f you overtake the last person, then you are…? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong
again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?
You’re not very good at this, are you?

Third Question:
V ery tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only .
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30 .
Add another 1000 . Now add 20 Now add another 1000
Now add 10 . What is the total?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you get 5000 ?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
If you don’t believe it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definite ly not your day, is it?
Maybe you’ll get the last question right….
….Maybe.

Fourth Question:
Mary’s father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono.
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn’t.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!
Okay, now the bonus round:
A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is
done.

Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of
sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He just has to open his mouth and ask…
It’s really very simple…. Like you!

PASS THIS ON TO FRUSTRATE THE
SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!